I Am Tired

I am tired. Now this may seem like an odd reflection because thus far we have been focusing on positives but positivity comes down to perception and why should being tired be seen as anything other than a completely human response to an excess of stimuli and mental or physical exertion? I am well, I am still going, but truthfully I am tired. Being tired is not a weakness, being tired does not mean we are giving up, being tired does not mean we are not enough, being tired means we are human. When we are mentally spent, when we are emotionally on empty, when physically we can take no more, let us tell ourselves “my love you are weary, my darling you need rest, but my beautiful spirit you are far from done.”

Breathe compassion over your tired state, cover yourself in Grace filled understanding and then remind yourself of all you have to fight for, to live for, to work for…Give yourself a moment, a week, a month. Afford yourself the opportunities needed to pause and refuel your mind and body, take a rest, cry it out, call of friend, take a bath… whatever it is show yourself some love. Then, when you are ready, resume your duties knowing that one day you will again find yourself weary and in need of rest but this is all part of the process.

I am well, I am still going, but yes I am tired, but that is OK. I am OK.

Love you all my sweet friends. #StrongerTogether

International Women’s Day 2020

My sisters …. you are so loved, so strong, and so worthy.

Happy women’s day to all of my unstoppable sisters.

How many times have you been called a ‘good girl’? How many times have you been told to ‘be good’? If you are anything like me, you have been hearing words like these almost your entire life. Societally speaking, females should strive to be good, be kind, be pretty, and be pleasant. But as Laurel Thatcher Ulrich once stated “Well-behaved women seldom make history.” Now before we start talking about the incredible power and strength each of us empowered women harness within the very fibers of our being, let’s clarify that we don’t have to ‘go rogue’ to be taken seriously. We don’t have to abandon femininity and trample on our inherent gentleness. These things can go hand in hand. Goodness does not exclude strength, and a fierce sense of power does not negate a kind heart or a gentle soul. Respect and power go hand in hand. ‘Good girls’ can also be fierce warriors for themselves and those they love. As females, we have a gentle kind of power. Our gentleness is part of our strength and only half of our power. We have the power to soothe souls with our actions and heal hearts with our words. We are compassionate creatures with a unique ability to bring about change and understanding through dignity and grace. But our gentle nature is balanced by our fierce desire for righteousness, respect, and equality. We have a gift of great power. We have the power to create. The power to influence. And the power to defend. We will not stand idly by while a sister is wronged. We stand up for others in their time of need because we know when our time of weakness comes, we too will be supported by a sisterhood ready for battle. We demand respect but we strive to do so first with gentleness and grace rather than force and coercion. If however our gentleness and grace are disregarded, we harness that internal fire and we unleash the true potential of the fierce warrior housed within our hearts.

Be kind, be strong, be loved, be well, be you.

Take Your Time!

My daughter woke up at 8:00 am this morning and strolled sleepily into the kitchen. “Good morning love!” I said to her which was met with a head butt to the chest (her early morning attempt at a hug 😂)

She stayed planted to my chest for a moment and then stared blearily up at the clock her eyes got wide and she said “oh no! I have to be to school in five minutes!”

I said don’t worry about that right now, how are you feeling (she had gone to bed super tired with a bit of a headache the night before.) I had let her sleep in, which happens maybe a couple times a year to make sure she was feeling ok.

She said she still had a slight headache and was super tired but was worried about being late for school.

I told her to relax with a nice warm shower and then have some breakfast,. I told her not to worry about being a little late but to instead give her body the care it needed this morning. I said you can’t expect to have a great day if you don’t give yourself time to start it right. ♥️

This goes for all of us. Don’t push yourself if your body is saying “I need a little extra time”. Give yourself space and grace. Listen to the cues your body is giving you and then do something gentle about them.

Occasionally being a little late because that’s what your body needed is nothing to feel stressed or shamed about. Show yourself compassion and gentility.

The Desire to be Seen

The most beautiful declaration of love is for someone to simply let you know that you are seen …..

Tonight as I was putting the kids to bed our daughter started to get a slight attitude and said something unkind to her brother. When I asked if she would like to reconsider her word choice she said “I’m tired…. I’m not nice when I’m tired.”

I gently reminded her that while being tired may be a reason that we react in a certain way, it is not meant to be used as an excuse for poor choices. Apologies were made and attitudes were adjusted and bedtime carried on without incident.

Now I’m exhausted too, my husband had been gone all day and he will be gone tomorrow as well but as I made my way to my much anticipated bath, he grabbed my shoulder as I passed and said “that was a great way to handle that. You’re an amazingly patient mom”

That right there meant more to me than any other gesture of love … that right there showed me that he saw me in a moment where I too was tired but reacted with love.

To every incredible woman reading this, I want you to know that I see you, I admire you, and I love you for who you are. I see you trying to make the necessary changes for yourself and your family so you can live your best life, I see you battling hardships and moving mountains, I see you practicing endless amounts of kindness, empathy, patience, and forgiveness, I see you never giving up, I see you…., you are loved.

You Are Beautiful and Perfect, A love note for teens!

I Love all children … but let me tell you there is a special place in my heart for teens. They are so vibrant, so ambitious, so creative, but yet so vulnerable. At my daughter’s dance class there was a beautiful group of teenage dancers. Lively, gorgeous, laughter bubbling over …. but I overheard them comparing themselves to someone else “look at her body” “I want that body” “ I wish I looked like that “ does she not eat” “ugh I need to stop eating”

Now I am not saying that these girls are starving themselves, but these kinds of thoughts can spiral so quickly. I have dealt with bulimia and it is hell… no one should ever feel like their beautiful body is not worth love and adoration.

I got up and walked over to them and I said “ hi loves, I’m going to be the weird random total mom right now and just tell you all that you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are and I hope you never forget that!”

If you have teens in your life please take a moment to remind them of how wonderfully unique they are. ♥️🙏 it’s an easy thing for any one of us to forget and it’s a simple thing to remind others

Mental Health Is Not A Shameful Topic

Mental Health is IMPORTANT!

Mental Health IN NOT SHAMEFUL!

You DESERVE to feel your BEST!

The other day my daughter told a family member about our new “family coach” I was then asked by said family member “aren’t you worried what people will think if they find out she is seeing someone for anxiety?” And “you know she has anxiety because she gets her lack of coping skills and lack of confidence from you.”

I am going to say two thing LOUD and CLEAR

1) who cares what other people think. If there is a need that needs to be met for your child or yourself ….. you meet it! Anxiety (depression too) is nothing to be ashamed of, and perhaps if it were more acceptable to talk about, people would realize Hey! I’m not alone!

2) if your child (or you) struggle(s) with anxiety, it doesn’t mean you are to blame! My coping skills are stellar compared to when I was a teenager and ya know what! coping skills take time to learn and my child will get there too. And as for confidence …. don’t let anyone ever tell you that you are not confident! They can’t be the judge of that…. that is something that comes from within!

Children Are Dying And Bullying Is To Blame

This was originally published through Anne Arundel First Alert

 

Children are dying and bullying is to blame. My name is Jillian Amodio and I am a mother of two. I had the honor of speaking before our board of education last week about the dire effects of bullying. As parents we are our child’s first line of defense. We need to be a bridge for communication and change.
We need to Speak up and be heard! Speaking in front of the board of education with regards to bullying prevention and parent involvement was truly empowering. Our children need us to stand up and the board needs to hear our concerns. The Board was incredibly receptive and understanding and genuinely sought to further understand the issues and seek appropriate solutions. As parents we are the most influential people in our children’s lives! Let’s use that effectively. We must stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves. Together we can be the voice of change.


Transcript “I speak today not as an enemy or aggressor, but rather an ally and a friend. I have lived in Anne Arundel County my entire life. I grew up in your school system. Bullying is the reason it took me nearly 28 years to know my worth and my value and it is the reason I don’t want this trend to continue. This year I began doing something I never thought I would do. I started homeschooling my second grader. I have withdrawn my daughter from two public schools in our county within the same school year due to unresolved bullying issues. She came home with bruises, scratches, and stab marks from pencils. But the physical representations of bullying are NOTHING compared to the damage I saw being done to her soul. She was continuously berated by a teacher. And she was threatened with gun violence by another student. I could go on, but her story is not unique, we all have one like it.
I was not allowed to know how these situations were being handled but I do know nothing changed. In fact it continued to get worse. School is not meant to be an anxiety inducing place of fear. A child cannot learn if they do not feel safe and secure. People need to be held accountable. Policies need to be in place to protect victims from being victimized over and over again. Current policies protect the aggressors more than the victims. Current policies do not work to address the underlying issues. The words spoken to our children become their inner voice and I refused to let my child’s inner voice become that of a bully. As a mom, it is not my job to simply protect my child, it is my job to protect all children and I will not stop until all of our children feel safe and loved. Children are not born cruel. There is something hurting deep inside the souls of these children who are harming others. All of our children deserve help, intervention, and meaningful guidance. I admire the programs being implemented in the high schools to help instill acceptance, although it is a sad reality that basic humanities must now be taught. However these types of programs must begin far sooner than high school. We must reach these impressionable minds sooner.
Our children are quite literally dying at the hands of this monster called bullying. Our children’s self esteem is crumbling under the unbearable burden of hatred that greets them in the hallways of the places where they are supposed to be most welcome.
I refuse to allow the lives of our children to be put at continuous risk by allowing them to endure behaviors day after day that should never be occurring in the first place. Science, math, language arts, health and phys ed…. These are all valuable areas of academic instruction. But nothing is more important than concerning ourselves with the mental, physical, and emotional wellbeing of our children. We must work together to empower and educate our children in the fine art of being kind and compassionate human beings. We must empower and educate our children to not stand silent in the face of violence, hatred, and injustice. If our children cannot learn to be kind and compassionate. Or love and respect each other, there is no hope for our future.

When we report bullying we are told things are handled but often times those assurances fall flat. There is power in conversation and parents need to be included in this dialogue. When the chain of communication is broken or falsified it is the end result that suffers.
My appeal to you today is to please help us help you make our schools the thriving place of love and learning that they are meant to be. Include us don’t discard us. Please let us work together to educate and inspire our children to be the people they are born to be.


Parents please guide your children and be the voice for those who need it.

The writer is Jillian Amodio, who recently spoke in front of the Board of Eduction regarding Bullying in schools. It can be viewed here